Wednesday, May 22, 2013

almost done

I don't even really know where to start on the whole deployment thing. In a way it was so much harder than I thought it would be. I was surprised at how much of my day was consumed with worrying and being sad. The first two months, I cried literally every day. Every night when I went to sleep alone was a really emo sob fest. I teared up at commericals. I cried over Justin Bieber songs. I sobbed underneath my sunglasses on my floatie in the ocean. There was nothing, happy or sad, that didn't make me cry. I was probably really terrible to be around, now that I think about it.

But in other ways it flew by. I was so busy being stressed out and busy at work that the weekdays all blended together, and the weekends were mostly full of friends and trying to have fun. I'm lucky to have the best friends anyone could have and they went out of their way on a daily basis to entertain me and keep life as normal as possible. I appreciate that every day. Once the halfway mark passed, I started to get really excited that he's coming back. Now that it's just a few weeks away, there's no more crying, just jumping out of my skin being so freaking excited. Patience is not my virtue (I can't think of what is my virtue, actually) and the waiting is making me nuts. In a way I feel like oh my god 3 weeks is soooo looooong but then I think of all the stuff I have to do (Find an outfit to wear! Clean the house a thousand times! Buy matching towels because somehow I lost half of them in the last 6 months! Get the car washed for the first time!) and I feel like there's no way I will be ready. But something tells me I'll be just fine.

The last almost 6 months have been so telling of us. Even though I knew on the first date that it was the beginning of something really, really important, this stupid deployment made it real. To me, to us, to everyone else. Doing long distance is not for the faint of heart. It's not something that I would wish for most people (a few people, though) and it's something I never, ever want to do again. BUT. Having us made it though and never wavering in our feelings or commitment really says something about us and maybe we wouldn't have known how strong we were together if we hadn't been apart. 

It also gave me a huge respect for military spouses and families that have to go through this on the reg and have it so much worse than we did. So much worse. My mom and grandma included. It's not fun and it's not easy for us left at home. I sometimes would forget because I was so wrapped up in my cryfest, but it's especially not easy for the ones who are depolyed. And me being a crybaby didn't make it any easier, I'm sure. But hey that's what he gets for loving a reformed emo girl, right?

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

a dollar makes me holler

So somehow I ended up watching an episode of "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo." And another. Before I knew it, my afternoon was gone and so were half of my brain cells.

I decided that it's this generation's Southern, reality version of "Roseanne." The family is crude, loud and eats way to much canned food but they love eachother and have a lot of fun. The show is centered around a lot of things I hate (child beauty pageants, extreme couponing, not eating vegetables) but deals with a lot of societal issues (teenage pregnancy, barnyard animals as pets, obesity, forklift foot) and is justfunny. Any criticism about their lifestyle is pretty hard to dispute (getting blind folded and having your family breathe their smelly breath into your face while you guess who it is is a questionable hobby, lets be real) but I don't think I've seen a funnier or sweeter kid on tv in a long time. Tried to hate it. Couldn't.

Honey Boo Boo had a (male) pet pig named Glitzy...
Source: via Ash Lee on Pinterest

But she keeps it real...

Source: via Ash Lee on Pinterest

After watching people eat spaghetti with literally a tub of fake butter and a bottle of ketchup on top of it, I just kind of feel like working out a little. Thanks, pinterest!

Wednesday, December 19, 2012


north shore staycation

north shore staycation by mostlyglasses featuring denim jean shorts

Excited this week because for once I'll be playing tour guide! My younger sister is coming to hang out for Christmas vacation, and I can't wait to circle the island a few times, go to my favorite beaches and do some stuff I've been too broke/too lazy to do and just hang out with someone that looks like me and is super cool. A staycation in Oahu is pretty sweet if I do say so myself.

Tuesday, December 18, 2012


Yesterday, I woke up at 7AM (on my first day of vacation from work) to go get my Hawaii state ID, AKA my kama'aina card. The office opened at 8 AM, and I thought I was doing pretty good when I got there at 8:15. If 'doing good' meant being #176 in line, then I did excellent. I am some sort of fool because I thought I would be in and out in an hour, so I didn't eat, didn't charge my phone and didn't bring anything to read or do while I was waiting.

Here's a few thoughts I had while sitting amongst a few hundred of my closest friends for 4 hours with nothing to do but creepily stare and get really annoyed and hungry... Why do people put their little girls (~3 years old) in high heels? They look like baby prostitutes. Don't get it. Why do people insist on playing games on their phones in public places really loud? Why are these people almost always adults? Why, when people listen to dubstep and other such terrible types of music (without headphones, of course) always say things like "can you feel the bass?"Yes, yes I can. Can you feel the daggers that are shooting out of my eyes? Thought so.

Four hours of sitting on a concrete floor in a dirty, dity government office and $36 in parking fees later, I felt like I wanted a TB shot (and a tequila shot) but I got my ID. Finally! Discounts on pretty much everything, here I come! Also, more importantly, my CA license picture (taken when I was 15 and had hot pink hair and a mega grumpy face) will no longer be my primary form of identification and therefore will no longer questioned by every bouncer and checkout person. WORTH IT.

My question for myself is... when did I change what side I part my hair on?! How does that just happen in life without me knowing it?

Monday, December 17, 2012


The recent events in CT have really had me thinking about kids, and the kids in my life that I love and miss every day. I can't imagine the pain that the families of the victims are going through and can't believe that people are capable of doing such terrible things, especially to children. Like everyone else, I'm in shock that these kind of events happen and can't stop thinking about it. One of the hardest parts of moving away from home for me was leaving my niece and nephews, cousins and all my friends' babies. I'm so lucky that when I go home to visit, I still have the chance to see all these little faces <3

Sunday, December 16, 2012

rockin' roxy

roxy stripes

roxy stripes by mostlyglasses featuring roxy dresses

Roxy is my all time favorite brand and lucky me got hooked up with a gift card to their store as a pre-deployment gift from the mister. Hush money, if you will. It didn't hush me for long, but I'm pretty excited to go set myself up with some new beach wear ASAP. Thanks, babe :]

Saturday, December 15, 2012

day 3 of deployment.

The day I've been dreading finally came on Thursday... my boyfriend deployed. For six months. To Japan. In terms of being a military girlfriend, I actually got a pretty sweet deal. He's not in combat, it's a short deployment and he will soon have regular phone and internet. In terms of a being a normal girlfriend, I got a totally crappy deal because, well, DUDE IS OFF MY ISLAND FOR SIX MONTHS. I have to keep reminding myself that plenty of people have it much worse than I do and to just take it one day at a time, but it still sucks. It really, really sucks. He's not only my boyfriend, he's my best friend and my partner in crime and him being gone leaves a huge void in my day to day life. I'm so lucky that I have such awesome friends here (and at home, thank you iphone for keeping me connected to my people) that keep me entertained and laughing during the day. I'm lonely at night and still accustomed to waking up at 4:30am to beep him down to the parking garage, so I've been watching episodes of Home Improvement when I wake up to distract myself. Man, is the intro to that show crazy or what, even 15 years after it came out.

We said a really sad goodbye at 5am on a street corner in Waikiki (in typical nighttime-in-Waikiki fashion, surrounded by hookers and drunk peeps) and then he got into a taxi and drove off while I sobbed in the street. And then it started raining. He said it was like a Humphrey Bogart movie, but that  scene was terrible and I would never want to watch something so crappy, haha.

I pack this much just for a weekend away
things that have made me cry in the last 3 days:
-a Navy lady in cami's in line at Starbucks
-half the songs on this play list of island jams
-'boyfriend" by Justin Beiber ...

If I was your boyfriend, I’d never let you go
 (But you did! You're gone!)
I can take you places you ain't never been before
(You are currently at a place I ain't never been before... without me!)
Baby, take a chance or you’ll never ever know
(But I did take a chance and I do know!)
I got money in my hands that I’d really like to blow
(I have no money to blow, so that just makes me sad in general)

things that have kept me sane in the last 3 days:
-finally having 2 weeks off of work!
-my little sis coming to visit this week!
-'indie dance radio' on Pandora
-constant calls/texts/fb messages from both of our families and friends. I <3 technology.
-ice cream...kind of a lot of ice cream
-Animal Planet shows about puppies [you win Sam, we can have a German shepherd one day]

So... 3 days down, 196 to go...